The Advantages and Disadvantages of Marriage Counselling

In a marriage there are two people involved and usually both have different perspectives. In many cases, a problem occurs because of these differences. A marriage counselor can help in resolving issues in marriage although of course, the couples have to put efforts and want their marriages to be saved.

The first step will be to find the right marriage counselor. We can ask our friends and / or family for a recommendation. We also have to look at the credentials. Probably the most important thing is the "chemistry" between the couple and the counselor. In counselling session, the couple will tell the counselor private things, things that they wont share to anyone. All counselors are sworn to keep their clients secrets, but there are person that we feel comfortable to tell our secrets and there are those that just can't "connect" to us. Recommendation and credentials are important, but we must put "chemistry" at the top because we will be sharing private stories and feelings that usually we keep for ourselves.

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The Advantages

Usually the counselor will act as a bridge, a mediator between the two conflicting parties. A good counselor will make every sessions productive. Both husband and wife (and if there are other party involved) will get the chance to say what is in their mind in civilized manner. A counselor can also offer advice and helping the couple to work through their problems and resolve them.

In many cases, the problem occur because a couple can't understand each other. They have things that for a certain reason they choose to keep for themselves and later causing a misunderstanding. After sometimes, the misunderstanding becomes bigger and it turns to a huge problem that can wreck a marriage. A counselor is there to resolve this communication issue, acting as a voice of reason between the couple.

The Disadvantages

There are couples that misunderstood a marriage counselor and expecting their counselor to make a "miracle". They are basically leaving the counselor to do all the jobs, i.e refuse to cooperate and tell what is really bothering them.

In most cases, couples are going to a marriage counselor as the last resort. It is even a common thing that one party (or both) is already file for divorced when they decided to try a marriage counselor. There is no quick fix for this situation. Both parties must want they marriage to be saved, they must willing to put their best effort and then the counselor will guide them through the whole healing process.

A marriage is not easy, and problems will occur. If you are having problems in your marriage and it seems that there is no way out, don't give up. Look for a marriage counselor that you feel the right person, and if you really want your marriage to be saved and willing to work for it, the marriage counselor may very well be the answer for your problems.